source: Wikipedia

Now, when I watch movies at home, I usually try to keep a pad of paper or a Word doc open and just stream my thoughts as the film progresses. In going over my so called “notes” for this film, I decided my play-by-play stream of consciousness was coherent enough to just copy/paste here as a review. Though, a word of warning, my stream of consciousness doesn’t care about spoiling it if you haven’t seen it. Just, be aware of that.

So without further ado, let me introduce myself.

Shanna’s

Spoilerifically Hilarious In-real-time Thoughts

Or Shanna’s S.H.I.T. for short.

i like how they don’t play around with the “the box has something in it”. no wasting time here. we all know what it’s supposed to be about, etc., no need for time wasting set up. let’s get right into the mix here.

My stream-of-consciousness self doesn’t capitalize. Deal with it.

i’m not okay, however, with the character development of the whole divorce/kids and dad thing. sort of, but it just seems forced at moments. — perhaps i’m wrong though. maybe that’s what teenage girls are just like, cause i certainly wasn’t, so i don’t know..

“i think you’ll feel better if you just stop giving a shit” …. spoken like a true teenager.

source: Ehmgeew on Tumblr

 Who could possibly embody this idea better than George? (From Dead Like Me, by the way.)

i love that the box opens by itself. that’s cool.

sometimes i hate the whole mirror shit — so she’s brushing her teeth, looking into a mirror, and doesn’t see the bug flying around behind her? and what’s with all the running water??

Yes, because as everyone knows, when you’re brushing your teeth you’re far too caught up in staring at yourself and making sure to do 32 cycles of up and down to notice anything happening behind you. Am I right? I know I’m right, because this is what all the movies and t.v. shows show us. Focus everyone, focus on those teeth!

Oh, and waste water like it’s 1999. Or 1899. Or 1599. Or some time period that makes the “don’t they know better than to waste water?” joke funny. But then again, she is like 10 or something years old, so I guess it’s completely normal. Or not. My kids harp on me about wasting water all the time thanks to their GREEN education in school. And they’re both younger than her. Hrm. She’s just wasteful, I guess.

definitely has some nice creepy touches… the sounds of eating suddenly seem sinister..

i like the whole child abuse aspect.

ha. new dudes a dick.

i like that dad took matters into his own hands. he don’t fuck around. very go getter. i like that.

ha. i knew mom would come bursting in, that was fairly obvious.

the movie’s an hour in, how long before mom figures it all out?

haha. cool. it could be seen on an mri. ha.

i’m assuming there’s a conversation missing somewhere, where he describes what the issue is to her mom, she dismisses it, and later becomes a believer – awkward lack of discussion. maybe unnecessary, but it’s still left out.

i like the family aspect of the ceremony. that’s cool.

they’ve unleashed a demon on a hospital. awe-some. though, seriously, i already know it’s not going to end as well as it possibly could — how neat would it be if it was a screwed up ending and the demon gets the girl’s body, and just starts slaughtering people? all cause of a yard sale…

Oh, wait, they already did that, didn’t they?

cool. it climbed out of his mouth. that was neat.

haha. i knew it was gonna get hit by a truck.

interesting how much influence it wields even outside the box, even locked inside.

anyway, overall, i liked it. i have a special place in my heart for possession/exorcism/demons/etc. i like what they did with this one. it was AWESOME to see the jewish version of a typically catholic/christian demon possession, and it’s especially creepy the weird shit that went on behind the scenes. must do more research into the dybbuk/dybbuk box thing. apparently that shit will freak you out.

heck, and it’s even based off some “real “events, in that a “dybbuk box” was bought on ebay, and said to be haunted — strange events and unfortunate occurings happened to the box’s owners and anyone in proximity (nightmares, hair falling out, one woman had a stroke, allergic reactions, welt, hives, etc.) And it contained weird shit to boot.. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dybbuk_box

the real box and it’s stories.. http://www.dibbukbox.com/story.htm

http://web.archive.org/web/20051105000557/www.andrew.cmu.edu/user/rubyc/eBay_dibbuk.htm

Well, if you’ve read to this point it means you must have already seen it, or if you haven’t seen it, I just ruined it for you.

My sincerest apologies.

That said, it’s not a bad flick as long as your expectations aren’t too high. If you’re already a fan of the whole “possession/exorcism” genre of horror films, you pretty much know exactly what’s going to happen whether it’s about Jewish demons or Japanese revenge spirits. In that case, it’s more about what they did differently, and I think The Possession will stand out for 1) actually being a film about demonic possession that wasn’t about Christianity (which counts as unique in my book) and 2) it had a few really neat moments, was pretty well-acted, and the story wasn’t bad considering the real story it’s based on. If you haven’t checked out those links yet, please do. The real story behind the Dybbuk Box is about as interesting (if a lot shorter to read) than the film.

Perhaps it’s an even greater coincidence that I finally wrote this blog up about The Possession and The Last Exorcism 2 is due out this Friday. I watched the first ages ago, and there is indeed on my hard drive another Shanna’s S.H.I.T. for it. I plan to go see the 2nd this weekend, because I can and a solo trip to the theater in my tiny burg is less than $15 bucks – including popcorn, drink, and a candy of my choosing.

Next HPH – The Last Exorcism 1 & 2.

Source:  Wikipedia

Tonight I saw Mama. It was the last time it was playing in theater in my tiny little burg, so I had to.

Man, am I glad I did. It’s a fantastic film. I jumped a few times. (And even covered my eyes once. *shh* Don’t tell anybody.) The film has an amazing atmospheric tension. Even now, sitting at home in a well-lit room in front of a humming laptop, I still haven’t been able to completely ditch the dreadful feeling that something is looking for me in the dark. And there’s not even any shadows nearby!

Source: Black-Cat-Loki on Tumblr

Don’t even try and tell me that’s not freaky.

I really don’t want to spoil it for everyone by giving away crucial details. I will say that if you know anything about the supernatural (ghosts, demons, e.g. watched a TON of horror flicks and read a TON of horror stories) you’ll realize fairly quickly this is a little twist on the La Llorona mythos.  The story, written by  Andres Muschietti, really draws from the La Llorona mythos and expands upon it into fresh territory. Muschietti originally penned this script as a short film which Guillermo del Toro later saw and decided it deserved to be a feature film.

I agree with Guillermo wholeheartedly. Muschietti created an atmospheric, startling, and honestly, beautiful horror story. Through the entire film my heart is pumping, I’m biting my knuckles to keep from yelling at the screen (although Jessica Chastain’s Annabel actually listened to my psychic ranting and DIDN’T do… whatever.. it was.. *not spoiling*), I’m sitting in a wee bit of fear and thinking I drank WAY too much soda . . . and then the dramatic conclusion comes and . . . it’s not at all what I was expecting.

I nearly left the theater in tears.

Source: MoralCodeofBuzzards on Tumblr (and Family Guy)

Overall I thought the movie was great. It had all the best elements of horror, none of the shtick, and some decent creepy CGI. And the girls playing Victoria and Lily = awesome.

So I know I can’t quite suggest going and seeing it in theaters (if it’s already left mine, then I KNOW it’s already left yours), but whenever it becomes available on DVD, go pick it up.

So I’ve got this pretty amazing kid. I have to start there. He’s really embraced the lifestyle, and spends as much time as I do watching horror movies (nothing too scary) or thinking about crazy weird stuff. And since I’ve been planning to see Prometheus, he has been excited to tag along.

But how can I take him to a prequel without giving him a tour of the series?

introducing the classics

Yesterday we watched Alien. It was awesome. Mostly because his reactions are freaking priceless (also in green, his favorite color):

Complete and utter ennui while the story is set up and established and Mom, where are the aliens!? Who’s gonna die?

Did that thing just grab his face? He’s dead, isn’t he? Yup, he’s gotta be dead. He’s not? Wow.

It’s gonna kill them now. They’re gonna get it on their face, yup.

–And at that oh-so-pivotal moment–

O. M. Gee, that alien is awesome!

(That’s my kid. #parentalpride)

Ok, for my birthday what I want is that game Minecraft and the alien plush toy from that magazine . Forget Call of Duty – just Minecraft and the plush. (ThinkGeek is a staple catalog in our home. He said “plush” a lot. It was killing me. He said it so much it sounds all weird now, alá Adventure Time. See video below. Plush. Pluuuushh.)

Back to Alien:

Lots of advice: Don’t go in there! Leave the cat! Just go!

And when the xenomorph is tossed out the airlock:

Look at him, he’s cooking. Let’s have some alien barbecue!

Pictured: Google search of “alien bbq” because

“xenomorph bbq” turned up nothing suitable.

So, Alien went over pretty well. Today, obviously, it was time for Aliens.

Are there boring parts? *sigh* Why do they need to have boring parts?

That company is evil, so evil.

I definitely want that alien plush for my birthday. Don’t forget. 

He even fetched the ThinkGeek catalog to remind me, and then asked if we could look up some more on the Internet. Found a load at this site here. He asked for one of each.

That one guy is stupid. That guy is a bad chicken.

–At the elevator scene–

The Queen’s going to get in the other elevator, isn’t she? She did, I predicted it! Those aliens are so smart!

–At the bitch-slap-wrestling-match between Ripley and the Queen–

(running back to the armchair by the tv) Front row seats for the fight!

Pictured: Front row seat(s)

post-movie Q&A

Let’s look up plushes! I don’t care about the history of aliens. Let’s look at pictures of the Queen. 

Following a big picture hunt of close-ups so he could better examine them, we discussed the other kinds of xenomorphs (Dog Alien/Runner from Alien³, PredAlien from AvP: whatever) and I had to give a quick summary of Alien³ and Alien:Resurrection.

Then he got bored and went to watch more Minecraft videos on the youtubes. It’s my fault really. I once looked up a tutorial/walk-through for a game I was playing (Dead Island) that he was watching me play (family thing) and ever since all he does is look up video game walk-throughs.

But speaking of youtube and munchkins, the other little one, Alexandra, spends all her computer time looking up My Little Pony songs, home videos girls a little older than her make with their toys, and recipes. (Seriously. She’s addicted to this one lady’s series about cupcake decorating, and keeps demanding we – her and me – make graveyard cupcakes for Halloween. *sigh* At least she’ll be a better cook than I am.)

Here’s how she watched the movie with us.

Pictured: My freckly shoulder. And a sleeping mini.

I really enjoyed watching the movies with Mike. He’s hilarious to listen to, he asks the oddest questions, and he’s willing to go fetch me a bottle of water or the remote while Alex is super-glued-dead-asleep to my side. (^_^) Look forward to more of these. Movies with Mike is definitely going to become a regular (infrequently regular?) segment. It will probably get me blogging more, since there really hasn’t been a whole lot of recent horror films released that are particularly interesting or worth watching. At least watching old flicks with Mike has some point of conversation. Maybe next time I’ll pause the movie and record particularly funny things he says for your enjoyment. Or just record the whole thing and edit it? I’ve never done that before. Food for thought.

Oh yeah, and…

Prometheus in 24 hours, 33 minutes and counting!!

So what’s this non-movie-review-themed blog going to be about? Well, if you haven’t caught on already…

Adventure Time (with Finn and Jake) is literally one of my favorite shows of all time. Not to suggest I don’t enjoy more adult fare too. I love The Walking Dead, Arrested Development, Alcatraz, Family Guy, Futurama, Johnny Test, Grimm, Once Upon A Time, and too many others to list because it exposes just how much time I waste sitting on my rear watching television. <sigh> But I can watch AT all the time and never really get bored, which says a lot for a kid’s show averaging 12 minutes per episode, with but 3 seasons in the can (so far).

I guess I’m a little over-excited since new episodes are hitting the adult-tube on April 2nd. I can’t wait!

But why bring this show up in the first place, you’re probably thinking as you scratch your head. Well, I think a lot can be learned from this show. It shouldn’t get overlooked just because it’s on Cartoon Network.

First, the show takes place in the Land of Ooo. Through reveals during certain episodes and the opening shots, the viewer realizes Ooo is actually planet Earth following some horrible, terrible catastrophic event. Remnants of war, bombs and planes and such, hang around like half-buried memorials to the world that used to be. Throwing logic right out the window, magic has become very real, the Candy Kingdom is filled with living, breathing, talking candy people, and Finn is the “last” human left.

Aside from its wildly apocalyptic setting, the show tackles some really serious plot lines. Zombies (twice), murderers, soul snatchers, of course Finn’s semi-lonely existence as the sole human anyone knows, vampires, whywolves, dungeons, beasts, best friends, kidnappers. One of my favorite moments finds Finn and Jake talking with talking Princess Bubblegum, in which they reveal Finn is the “last” human around and was found abandoned in the forest. Princess Bubblegum asks if Finn has any interesting stories about his human relatives, and he replies: “I’ve never met any other humans. When I think about it I get all soul searchy and weird.”

I freaking LOVE that stuff. There’s these little interjections of awesomeness between the fart and prank jokes that gets overlooked because it’s a show for children. The show tackles moral questions through the eyes of a heroic, violent boy on the cusp of teenagedom (he’s 13), and asks “Why not?”

Maybe I enjoy the show so much because in some ways, I really am still a child. For example: When you see a house with a  turquoise/blue lawn, you know that pesticide was recently put down, right? Well, I thought it was paint and I didn’t learn it wasn’t until my husband told me so. One day I had remarked how silly it was that people painted their lawns in summer since the grass dies – especially since they painted it an unnatural color like blue – and he actually doubled over with laughter and told me through his tears that it was pesticide, not paint. I was 22 at the time. Just so you know. Go ahead and get your laughs in. I’ll wait and doodle.

From left to right: Jake, Ice King, Finn. Also my not-so-hot drawing skills are so math, right?

But really, the biggest lesson I take away from Adventure Time is to have fun, be yourself, be silly, be whatever you feel like being. (Insert create wherever it fits.) I realized recently I’ve been so wrapped up in writing something good — something that matters – I haven’t been creating and there is a difference between the two.

So thanks, Penn Ward and the Adventure Time cast and crew, for reminding me to enjoy what I do, even if I get a little silly (or plain crazy) at times.

Filed under: Writing ]]> http://shannawynne.com/2012/03/23/algebrai/feed/ 0 Shanna Algebraic Adventure_Time logo soul searchy and weird my drawings http://shannawynne.com/2012/02/29/hump-day-horror-presents-fright-night/ http://shannawynne.com/2012/02/29/hump-day-horror-presents-fright-night/#comments Wed, 29 Feb 2012 18:43:14 +0000 Shanna Wynne http://shannawynne.com/?p=873 Read more]]> Hump Day is here, and that means my life needs just a tad more horror in it. Up this week is Fright Night.

Oops, wrong one.

Sorry ’bout that. This here be the film I’m reviewing.

That's better.

Some quick facts and stats:

The stars I can name: Colin Farrell, Anton Yelchin (who to be honest, I could not have named if not for his impeccable role as Chekov … nuclear vessels .. If you DIDN’T read that in Chekov’s accent, you are NOT as much of a nerd as I am), and The Doctor himself, David Tennant. Then there’s some other people I don’t know. Feel free to browse the cast list at the movie’s IMDB page for more info.

Let’s get started, shall we?

Hey, I didn't know Criss Angel was in it too.

First, it is a rare moment when I end a film, any film, ready to rewind and watch it again. (That’s kind of old school for some of you young’uns who’ve never seen a VHS. Rewind, you ask? Well, it’s this thing where you wait an eternity only to find the video machine has come alive and destroyed everything you loved..) But I ended this movie so pumped I went through each section of the menu wishing there was more to watch (aside from a pretty funny blooper reel).

Second, this movie made me realize I’ve never written a vampire story. That’s something that needs to be fixed. Like now.

But back to the film… It opens with Peter Vincent’s show Fright Night, revealed to be a Criss Angel like stage show in Vegas. I have to admit, I really enjoyed the way the directors and writers updated the film. I didn’t know what to expect going in. I have figured it’d be an iffy shot-by-shot remake. Instead they took their time to think of how the movie would look if it were produced today. Peter Vincent is Criss Angel, Charley Brewster is a former-nerd-turned-douchebag-to-get-the-girl, Evil Ed is a nerdy Evil Ed, and Jerry is as malicious and violent as you’d expect a vampire in 2011 to be, more in line with the vampires of 30 Days of Night than with the more… romantized *cough–#*$holes–cough* of Twilight.

This is how I picture Eddy when I remember he sparkles. (Also my paint skillz are mad awesome, right?)

Anton Yelchin as Charley was passably entertaining. Or let me rephrase — he actually played a former-dweeb-turned-d’bag really well. It’s hard to be sympathetic for him in the beginning, but he becomes more likable when he gets down to business later. As well, Amy (who plays her? Some blonde.. name was Imogen Poots I think.. Wait, I’m dying laughing.. Yes, I do remember her name. Poots is a hilarious last name. I’m sorry, Imogen, but at once I’m happy you’re doing well with that. Also, a brief Google search reveals she was in 28 Weeks Later. She was the annoying older sister who started all the trouble in the first place) is passable as a ridiculously-hot teenager girl dating what is ostensibly a loser.

But really, the best performances in this remake are by Colin Farrell and David Tennant. I would’ve been happier with way more Jerry and Peter Vincent screen time.

Farrell’s Jerry isn’t the same sexual predator that Chris Sarandon’s was. (That scene in the 1985 film, between Jerry and Amy on the dance floor STILL makes me feel as uncomfortable as though I were 12 and watching it with my parents.) Farrell’s Jerry is violent and thirsty. When he sucks blood there’s little sexual gratification in it. It’s all about hunger and dominance, whereas Chris Sarandon’s vampire was about survival. Recall, if you will, that in 1985 Jerry offered Charley the chance to just forget that he was a vampire, they’d stay out of each other’s business and he’d get to live – as well as his loved ones. But in the original, Charley felt morally bound to stop the vampire before he fed on any more innocent people. In this version, I could buy if this Charley accepted that offer. He seems intent in the beginning on just keeping out Jerry, not destroying him.

David Tennant as Peter Vincent was superb. I couldn’t sum up his performance adequately. He makes me reconsider ever wearing leather pants — not that I have or was actually considering that, but I’ll definitely forego it for sure now.

The Doctor in that get-up. I can't get enough of it.

Performances aside, the story had the same premise, but really managed to convey a sense that it was a film in its own right, too. I think there’ s some interesting changes to characters (Peter Vincent gets a little more backstory and a wicked awesome Vegas apartment… penthouse suite.. something) and to the explanation of vampires (and Jerry) in particular. The CGI and special effects are great. The vampires are scary, not sparkling, and all is right in the world.

If you’re a fan of Fright Night or real vampires, you’ll enjoy it. If you prefer nighttime preternatural beasts that sparkle, well, that’s your prerogative, now isn’t it?

See what twenty years will do to you?

Today we’re watching …

So, this movie is quite hilarious. And so sweet, with a really deep meaning underneath the gore. Don’t judge a book by its cover. The crazy starts when Dale (Tyler Labine, from Reaper — an amazing cancelled TV show everyone should watch) attempts to talk to a “rich, college” girl at a gas station, and things just go downhill from there. His good friend and lifelong buddy Tucker (Alan Tudyk, from Firefly/Serenity — again amazing.. cancelled.. whatever, go watch it now!) spends most of the film encouraging and supporting Dale in his efforts to win over the sweet Allison (Katrina Bowden . . *crickets* dunno her, so.. whatevs).

Hilarity ensues when Allison’s friends lose their minds and all notion of rationality when attempting to “rescue” her from the hands of “killer hillbillies.” People die, *almost* entirely at their own hands. But, hey, Token Black Guy didn’t die first — that’s always a nice change of pace. Aside from that, not much else makes sense — unless you ascribe to the belief that college kids buy stock in their own brand of stupidity. Then you might just think its as logical as can be.

In the end, as hilarious as the movie is, it also reminds us that a cute funny fat guy is way better than a lunatic frat boy with anger issues.

Also, run with care.

Overall, the movie is funny, kind of touching, and I laughed out loud a few times. Not quite barrel rolls but a chuckle now and then is good. Really, I’ll watch anything with Alan Tudyk in it. Have you watched that guy in action?

Oh, Wash, how I miss you.

So, go forth and enjoy, derps and derpettes. It’s worth at least a viewing on Netflix Instant. (Or a buy if you’re into that type of bloody horror comedy. Not quite up to the zom-rom-com standards set by the amazing Simon Pegg, but a close third.. ish.)

Also, school picked up steam (or continued at its infinitely sedate pace, whichever) and I wrote millions of essays, or at least it seemed that way. I can officially say that I am this <–> close to hating essays.

But that isn’t to say I haven’t been writing. I have been, and I even submitted something. It’s time to get this whole “writer” thing rolling again. (Sorry, le 9gag, you must give me back my souls now!) I just haven’t been blogging. Haven’t felt like I had anything to add to the conversation.

Enough with le excuses!

Suffice it to say, I’ll be blogging regularly. About what you ask? Oh, anything I feel like. Horror movies. Books. Comedies. Writing. Munchkins. It’s all up for grabs.

First, though, check this out:

My hubby swears I must be the reincarnation of the woman on the couch, third from the left. In a former life, I was a candidate for Miss Beatnik 1959. And named Patti.

Also, my photoshop skills are quite suckiest. After a couple hours, I give up trying to glue my face onto hers. It would’ve been funny, though. Oh well.

So my blogging skills are rusty. I’m going to have to get these muscles used to working again. I hope everyone clicked on the link to 9gag. I could always use a few more souls under my belt.

Til next time, when I return with a flick for “Hump Day Horror” and more blathering.

- le Weird One

First, I absolutely adore the works of Brian Lumley. When I was 13(ish), my stepfather introduced me to the Necroscope, and I was forever in love.

Pictured: True Love

Lumley has an amazing writing style, and one day I will have to pour my thoughts about him (and others) into a blog all his own. Suffice it to say, he’s a fantastic writer and his approach his all his own.

In terms of the book at hand, Lumley takes on the Old Ones, fathered by H. P. Lovecraft. The style in which both The Burrowers Beneath and The Transition of Titus Crow are written is very reminiscent of Lovecraft. While the vocabulary is updated (but mind you, it’s still dated by our 2011 standards considering both were originally written prior to 1975) from the words used by Lovecraft and crew, the Titus Crow books are permeated by the atmosphere and power locked within the pages of such masterpieces as The Shadow Over Innsmouth and The Call of Cthulhu.

The title character, Titus Crow, is completely Lumley’s creation. Unlike many of the fragile-minded protagonists in Lovecraft’s work, usually left doddering as insanity soaked them through, Lumley’s characters are made of sterner stuff. Lumley is quoted as saying:

I have trouble relating to people who faint at the hint of a bad smell. A meep or glibber doesn’t cut it with me. (I love meeps and glibbers, don’t get me wrong, but I go looking for what made them!) That’s the main difference between my stories…and HPL’s. My guys fight back. Also, they like to have a laugh along the way.

I can’t help but relate to this thinking. I know as much as I enjoy Lovecraft’s work, I still feel a little letdown that humanity isn’t able to put up a better fight.

But that’s not what’s going to happen in this book! Not with a main character who looks like this –>

That is one awesome moustache and beard combination. One that will defeat Cthulhu!

I will be honest, though. I read the book last August, so it has been a while. That said, a lot has stuck with me. Crow has some amazing adventures in Transition, including encounters with the Hounds of Tyndalos, travels to new worlds and dimensions, spending an exorbitant amount of time lost among the space time continuum and more.

The Burrower’s Beneath, quite frankly, was amazing. Fraught with tension, and of the can’t-be-put-down-all-night quality that can be so hard to find in books today, The Burrower’s Beneath is not only readable despite its dated language, but enjoyable beyond measure.

Also, there was one bit that prompted me to actually write a note for my own devices. While I’m certain I’ve seen this method used before, it never quite set off the flash bulb in my brain enough for what it does to sink in. Here, within the delicate folds of Titus Crow, I had an Eureka Moment.

Pictured: Eureka – House Style

Whether to save room for stories in the future, while tantalizing readers today, or whatever his reasons, there are a few sections of Transition that are elliptical’d. Quite a bit. Leaving delicious bits exposed for the reader’s taste buds, while hiding the juicier heft to our imagination. I must say that while it left me a little frustrated and wanting to know more, I found it overall a wonderful way of teasing me to the point of … extreme satisfaction … but not quite getting me there in the end. Which leaves the rest of the novel to satisfy my hungry demands.

Titus Crow does just that. Overall, if you’re a fan of Lovecraft, it is extremely like you’ll enjoy this book, among Lumley’s many other takes on the Cthulu Mythos. If you’re not a fan of Lovecraft, reading this will make you one, or at the least curious enough to seek out the original.

Head on over to Amazon and pick up Titus Crow today!

bloody and terrifying.. deliciously terrifying...

So let’s take this double shot straight to the head!

Hump Day Horror

Double Shot

Necromentia

Directed  and Written by Perry Teo; Co-Written by Stephanie Joyce

Starring Layton Matthews as Morbius; Chad Grimes as Travis; Santiago Craig as Hagen; Zelieann Rivera as Elizabeth; Zach Cumer as Thomas; and Nathan Ginn as Mr. Skinny

For an indie film, this one isn’t bad. Fans of the genre will immediately notice a striking similarity to Clive Barker’s Hellraiser in visuals and atmosphere. The premise is interesting: a Ouija board carved into flesh has the ability to open a doorway to Hell, offering a grieving man a chance to recover his lover… and that’s where the cover description ends and after about 45 minutes you realize the movie isn’t exactly all Dante’s Inferno (the game, not the poem). There is far more back story involved, and it isn’t until you reach about the hour mark that you realize the story is being told entirely backwards (alá Irréversible) and that’s when you start catching on to what’s really happening. A disgusting man is searching for his lover; a lost and still living soul seeks his brother; and a … well, that’s supposed to be the surprise part of the end, so I won’t ruin that.

But suffice it to say, the movie overall is good enough for a single-viewing, maybe even a second to understand it better, but I can’t see this film really standing the test of time. I think there was a lot left unsaid that could have really helped the film go past that line, but that’s the burden of the indie film. Low budget done well can be really good, but rare is the low budget film that will last a lifetime.

The best part of the film is a strange dream/hallucination (maybe more?) sequence where a dancing pig named Mr. Skinny manipulates a mentally disabled teenager. The insane song Mr. Skinny sings will definitely be an aspect that stands the test of time, as well as Chad Grimes’ performance as Travis, the living and lost soul searching for his brother. Be prepared for some intense and bloody torture scenes, some disgusting insinuations, and that crazy lullaby. Good job on the song, Mr. Teo. Really good job.

My Soul To Take

Directed by Wes Craven

Starring Max Thieriot as Adam “Bug” Hellerman; John Magaro as Alex; Denzel Whitaker as Jerome; Zena Grey as Penelope; Nick Lashaway as Brandon; Paulina Olszynski as Brittany; Jeremy Chu as Jay; Emily Meade as Fang; and Raul Esparza as Abel

For a mainstream teenage pop horror flick, this one isn’t bad, either. Craven is certainly showing that he hasn’t lost his skills. The film is filled with tension from beginning to nearly-end. Unfortunately, for the experienced movie-goer (and plot-writer), the ending is fairly easy to spot, but it’s not too hard to suspend your instinct to keep enjoying the movie anyway. The best part is in the beginning, when the original Riverton Ripper is acting out his .. possession? mental illness? hallucinations? Something like that. Either way, it’s a pretty good scene and well-acted by Raul Esparza. Later in the film, “Bug” has similar scenes and Max Thieriot does the scenes justice as well.

The movie is fairly straightforward. The idea is that there was once this bad guy who swore he’d be back for revenge, and 16 years later to the day, the day turns bloody. Seven kids born that night, one of whom has inherited the soul of the murderer, and no one can be quite sure who it really is. There’s an interesting sub-plot that could have been better developed. Another member of this “group,” Emily Meade as Fang, is revealed to be a crucial character only near the end, and you wonder how she ended up as the school’s female Godfather, running the “Mean Girls + One Idiot Jock Mafia.” Aside from the main character, Fang is the next most interesting character and could have used more development, but it is understandable. There’s only 2 hours and how much can Craven really fit in?

At the very least, the film isn’t Craven’s attempt at a “Jennifer’s Body” type of teenager flick, with some hot girls titillating the movie audience. It’s a sound film with a solid plot that might be obvious at times, but is enjoyable in the end. It’s also not a movie likely to last a lifetime, but it is a fun watch on a stormy spring evening. You might even jump at the shadows when it’s over. Maybe.

For a second opinion on Necromentia, try this review at QuietEarth and for another on My Soul To Take, try RottenTomatoes.

Final Tally
Necromentia     Three Bloody Hearts
       My Soul To Take     Three and a Half Bloody Hearts

Well, perhaps not the end of the world. At least, not until December 21, 2012. (By the way, my apologies for that link. It was uncalled for. Try this one instead. It will hopefully be more to your liking.)

Unfortunately, while I’m still holding out hopes for a Zombie Apocalypse in 2012, I’m not really counting on it either. In the mean time, I am getting busy working on my bachelor’s degree. (It’s only been 9 years. About darned time I got started!) I’m getting my degree in Creative Writing and English online, and part of why I’ve been absent. School has been great, if a lot of busy work. (I write a LOT of essays!) But as I’ve started to get things balanced, it’s time to get back into the step of things.

Some updates since my last post:

I’ve moved once again. We’re stationed in yet another small Texas town, and moving has certainly been its own brand of fun. My poor, poor babies have been overturned and hauled around again. Those long-suffering books of mine, which had just gotten comfortable on their shelves, had to be packed up and moved again. Oh, yeah, and everybody else, too. I can say this honestly… I hate moving. I’ll probably start looking forward to it again in a few years, but for now, I’m glad to be getting comfortable again.

Getting comfortable again, adjusting to this new much busier schedule of mine, does include writing! Wait, let’s do that with a little more celebratory attitude…

I‘M WRITING!

Also I’ve got some plans in the works. Secret, world conquering plans. Which I will divulge at a later date. But just know the blueprints exist for domination. And domination it will be.

On the horror movie review front, I’ve got some reviews lined up, like: Necromentia, The Last Exorcism, Shutter, My Soul to Take, and I Sell the Dead. There will be others as they roll in, some new and some old. All with a touch of my individual brand of humor. (Flavored crazy, touched up with short and sweet.) Time for some Hump Day Horror with some Double Doses.

There’s book reviews in store, some free fiction, and a whole site overhaul. Keep an eye out for things to come! But with that in mind… it’s mid-terms, and I’ve got homework!

Random Truths I Should Never Admit to on the Internet #193

While wasting my time connecting with people on FB, in my mind I make car revving noises (vroom, vroom), and squealing brakes (eerrr@!!) when I begin an earnest session of drive-by status commenting… and/or updating my own status. Also and/or not including repetition of random words “like likety like like” and “status statusy.. status statusy..” Is my insanity showing?