Well, perhaps not the end of the world. At least, not until December 21, 2012. (By the way, my apologies for that link. It was uncalled for. Try this one instead. It will hopefully be more to your liking.)

Unfortunately, while I’m still holding out hopes for a Zombie Apocalypse in 2012, I’m not really counting on it either. In the mean time, I am getting busy working on my bachelor’s degree. (It’s only been 9 years. About darned time I got started!) I’m getting my degree in Creative Writing and English online, and part of why I’ve been absent. School has been great, if a lot of busy work. (I write a LOT of essays!) But as I’ve started to get things balanced, it’s time to get back into the step of things.

Some updates since my last post:

I’ve moved once again. We’re stationed in yet another small Texas town, and moving has certainly been its own brand of fun. My poor, poor babies have been overturned and hauled around again. Those long-suffering books of mine, which had just gotten comfortable on their shelves, had to be packed up and moved again. Oh, yeah, and everybody else, too. I can say this honestly… I hate moving. I’ll probably start looking forward to it again in a few years, but for now, I’m glad to be getting comfortable again.

Getting comfortable again, adjusting to this new much busier schedule of mine, does include writing! Wait, let’s do that with a little more celebratory attitude…

I‘M WRITING!

Also I’ve got some plans in the works. Secret, world conquering plans. Which I will divulge at a later date. But just know the blueprints exist for domination. And domination it will be.

On the horror movie review front, I’ve got some reviews lined up, like: Necromentia, The Last Exorcism, Shutter, My Soul to Take, and I Sell the Dead. There will be others as they roll in, some new and some old. All with a touch of my individual brand of humor. (Flavored crazy, touched up with short and sweet.) Time for some Hump Day Horror with some Double Doses.

There’s book reviews in store, some free fiction, and a whole site overhaul. Keep an eye out for things to come! But with that in mind… it’s mid-terms, and I’ve got homework!

Random Truths I Should Never Admit to on the Internet #193

While wasting my time connecting with people on FB, in my mind I make car revving noises (vroom, vroom), and squealing brakes (eerrr@!!) when I begin an earnest session of drive-by status commenting… and/or updating my own status. Also and/or not including repetition of random words “like likety like like” and “status statusy.. status statusy..” Is my insanity showing?

 

 

 

But… I am here now. And this is better than staring at Facebook wondering if I should bother seeding new crops on Farmville. The way Facebook has taken over my life…

So I’m sitting here right now… honestly, waiting for the clock to go round enough so I can wash the dye out of my hair…  (yeah, I do that sometimes… but only when the hubby’s made a point of saying “Shanna your roots are showing and their 3x lighter than the rest of your hair…” LOL) … thinking of what to blog about..

For me, this is like that meet and greet small talk at a work picnic for the spouse where you don’t know anybody. It’s been a while, I’m out of the habit (shameful!), and now… The weather has certainly been lovely lately here in Texas. It’s quit raining finally. (The first month we were here it seemed to rain every other day!) But now it’s warming up, our air conditioning went kaput, and the only cool air is in my home office. (ha! Encouragement to go write or what?)

Man. Look at all those typos. The atrocious format. Writing is long over due. I’m turning into one of those people who spends too much time writing like they’re in a chat room, or updating a social network status.

Although I do find it highly amusing that even without blogging regularly… at all… for months, I still get 10-20 views per day. That’s pretty sweet, actually. Does that mean I have some sort of audience? At the least, I’ll have to send Google a big thank you for finding ways to place my blog in search listings!

So here I am. For those wondering where I went, life whisked me away for a while. But I’m making my return.

I can’t think of anything funny, witty, or even entertaining to really add.

Tomorrow I’ll try to put something together more legible. How’s that?

Lazy Writer,

What has been up with you lately? Sure, you don’t put out much on a regular basis, but seriously… a month? A whole month with zero posts? Or any hard core writing at that?

This is your warning. Get back on track or we will send the Big Ass Patrolman around to your kick your booty.

Pissed Off,

Life

So, I’ve had a busy month. Lots of ups and downs. A few personal issues and just fatigue in general. Makes writing and blogging a difficult, though not completely impossible. (I am posting… finally, right?)

As such, I have only one question to ask…..

What is up with getting MORE site views when I don’t post at all than when I post regularly???

No, really. I’ve had days with over 100 sites views. I haven’t had that many site views since the FIRST day I announced the site was open to the public. Nearly 2 years ago!

So, thanks for being loyal I guess.

I think this means I owe you guys something.

Well, here ya go.

Keep trespassing all you want, however. Visit every link you can and don’t forget to leave footprints!

I’ll be back soon. Pinkie promise!!

However, I received this notice earlier today:

To Shanna Wynne, writer extraordinaire:

We must unfortunately inform you that the links you wish to provide on your latest and greatest blog are down. They have crashed and appear as Network Not Found. The internet equivalent to the Blue Screen of Death.

When these links are resurrected, we will update you immediately. Then you may proceed to write and publish your blog.

With deepest regrets,

The Internet

There you have it. The problem-at-hand. I could post the blog unfinished, without the links, but it just wouldn’t be the same.

As such, here are funny pictures to amuse us while we wait.

One of my favorite Calvin and Hobbes comics.

This one makes me think….. Would I do that?

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I suppose two funny pictures are enough. Not only is the Internet ashamed for messing up my links, but for some reason, it’s also interfering with my blog – writing. (Buttons and stuff getting stuck. Had to undo stuff several times. It wants to put everything in block quotes. *sigh*)

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RANDOM PARANOID FEAR OF THE DAY #56

That there will be that fateful day on the escalator when my shoe laces or the hem of my jeans will get caught in its vice-like teeth and I will be chewed up into fajita meat.

That thing is just scary looking…. It is in disrepair, I admit, but even the working ones terrify me.

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Have a terrific Sunday. I will return and post more. Hopefully the Internet fixes my link problem so I can post Part 2 to the Writer’s Online Tool Box series.

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On the Online Front:

The blog after this will be Part 2 of my Writer’s Online Tool Box series. In it, we’re going to discuss the various market websites and tools writers can use to help them organize their schedule of upcoming deadlines and such. (Google Calendars, I love you.) I’m also going to download Google Chrome and see how it performs as a browser, and I’ll let you all know how it goes.

On top of that blogging project, I’ve got several book and movie reviews to write. For esteemed horror/fantasy fiction such as Neil Gaiman’s American Gods, Bentley Little’s The Store, Richard Laymon’s Body Rides, and so much more I can’t name them all. As for movies, I’m going to go over the backlog on my Netflix and write up all the reviews I haven’t written up. As for Saturday Night Horror Fest, everybody’s schedules are so busy, we haven’t really had one in a while. But I’m going to try to get back in the habit. My movie reviews are what bring people to the site the most, ironically, so I need to keep up with those.

I will also finish the blog on Passive Voice soon enough, and follow that craft/grammar blog with another about Stereotypes and Cliches. (This one is irking me right now because of the anthology story I’m working on. The “chick-flick” story that I don’t want to dip into cliches in, but there’s a certain expectation of “women sitting around talking” scenes that I might have to give in to.)

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On the Writing Front:

There’s a lot of upcoming anthologies I would like to submit to, and need to write stories for. I generally don’t do this type of thing. I am a “write first, submit later” kind of gal, but there’s some interesting anthologies that are just screaming at me to submit to.

There’s a Zombies VS Vampires anthology that could be a lot of fun. Another called All About Eve, which is the “chicky” story I’m working on in my spare time right now. (This one I make no guarantees about. It’s a whole new area of writing for me. More dialogue than anything, though that’s not a problem. It’s just making the conversation between two women realistic….. I’m not much of a gossiper, so I’m not sure how women talking gossip really talk!)

First and foremost is the novel. I have a title now, finally. My grandiose work of fiction will be called “The Monsters Among Us” (Or perhaps, “Monsters Among Us”… Haven’t decided on the “The” yet.) I’ve had a busy couple of days, very little time to do more than lay down notes and such, so I’m looking forward to this evening. I’m going to write my little tail off.

When I’m done with my word count goal for the novel, I’m going to clean up a couple stories and submit them somewhere. *sigh* Hardest part of the biz. Sending your babies out to impress people and crossing your fingers they do a good job.

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There you are. My work list for a day, maybe two. I always overload my brain, but it’s the way I function best.

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Thanks for listening. Here’s a cookie.

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Here’s a new segment I was going to start last year and forgot about.

RANDOM PARANOID FEAR OF THE DAY # 78:

That one day while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I’ll get distracted and forget it’s there, slap a pair of stereo headphones on my head and send that neglected Q-tip 2 inches into my brain. I’m very careful with Q-tips.

OOPS

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Have a great Sunday! Remember to come back for more of … well, more of … whatever you want to call this Shan-tastic weirdness!

I’ve got a new Taskmaster.

He’s finally started really kicking me in the butt about my writing. Mostly because I started the first real novel and now he’s excited.

Of course, I’m referring to my husband. The wonderful Marquis Wynne. Who punishes me harshly when I don’t get my pages done. When he sees that I wasted time blogging he’ll probably beat me with razor chains and fluffy bunnies.

(I stole the razor chains line from a friend on Zoetrope, Lucas Pederson. Thanks Lucas!)

He’s also pushing me to blog more often, and unload some of my back log (the stuff I’m concerned doesn’t really belong anywhere in the publishing world) onto the website. Since I haven’t posted any new stories for reading, he’s making me. It’s a good thing. I don’t post them in the hopes an editor will brush across the website and fall madly in love with my writing style. (Though if that happened, I’m not going to argue.) I post it for you, my lovely readers, of which at least 4 stop by every day. Which I think is amazing. I’m nobody and four different people stop by my website a day? Wow.

There’s going to be a new feature, as you’ve probably already noticed. It’s called “Free Fiction of the Month.” I’ll post a new story up on the main page and you can stop by and read, as well as comment. (Which you can’t do in the Free Library.) It’ll stay up until the end of the month, where I’ll retire it to the Free Library and post a new story. I will also do my darnedest to keep it fairly close to the top for the entire month.

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As for the Novel front, it’s coming along pretty good. I’ve got a goal, the hubby is brow-beating me to keep it. I want to finish around page 400. I’m going to sit down for some time today or tomorrow to start an outline, something to keep me focused on the story.

My only real problem writing the novel is that I tend to ramble in my writing. I know that not everything in the first draft will be good. That doesn’t concern me. It’s when I write something I just KNOW I will end up editing out, and then I wonder, “Why bother writing this?” And I feel the urge to just go back and erase it all that I get into trouble. Where do I draw the line?

So I keep pushing forward. Through the tough scenes and the boring mud until I reach a fresh, back on track point. Mentally I make a note that this area will require serious editing.. .when I’m done.

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Well, it’s Saturday night. That means it’s Saturday Night Horror Fest. We’ve got Feast and the straight-to-DVD Feast 2: Sloppy Seconds. As well as “The Midnight Meat Train.” There will be reviews tomorrow.

So keep on trucking, readers and writers. There will always be room for a little more horror in your life. Maybe in the next year I’ll be the author on the shelves providing it.

But don’t worry. It’ll be good as new (or back to old) tomorrow.

Thanks!

~Shanna

Edit:

Let me know what you think of the new header image. I have so much fun making them, I’d like to know what everyone thinks. (I showed it to the hubby when I finished and as he read it aloud, he laughed. I always know I’ve done something good when he laughs.

After much thinking, and staring at the index card I’ve taped to the wall with Kill Your Darlings written on it, I have decided that I needed to rid both myself and the web of the infamous intro page. Not that it wasn’t worthwhile, but it did take too much away from the site. Making my blogs–the thing the whole website is about anyway, right?–the front page is much simpler and gets to the heart of the matter.

Things will be much bloodier from now on.

That in mind, I must thank two people for it. First, my stepdad whose website has always been simple, yet entertaining. Visit it at www.stevegraham.org. And a fellow scribe, Lincoln Crisler whose recent blog on making the website simple made things, well, simple. Thanks, fellas.

I’m off to get some writing done. Hope everyone enjoys the simplicity that is (I hope) shannawynne.com.

It’s driving me nuts that I can’t figure out how to fix it.

So hopefully it’ll either fix on its own, or I’ll figure out how. Until then.. well.. it doesn’t make the site too ugly.

And can you believe it? It’s been one week and five days since I announced the site’s grand opening on myspace –and that was it, just myspace– and I’ve already got over 200 site views! These don’t include my own regular visits to make sure everything’s running okay, or updating stuff here and there. That makes me amazingly proud.

I would be prouder if I had a few more subscribers for the newsletter, but they’ll come in time. Speaking of the newsletter anyway, I’ve got a great new company I’m going to go through and I’ll be sending out the first newsletter from the new website soon. It’s going to look great.

So enjoy the middle of this week. I know I’m trying to.

And I’m driving.

That’s right. Nuts, ‘fraid of the car two blocks behind me – not to mention that car 30 feet in front of me who keeps swerving, just the littlest bit, over the yellow line – is driving for 8 hours on 4 lane blacktop highway tomorrow. Although, laughingly, my mother (the reason I am driving instead of someone more capable) has sworn that if I go too slow she will take over driving. Which is a good threat, because she knows I’d never let her. She’d be in agony by the time we got to Freeport, that dang-blasted neck injury of hers.

Which leads me to the next best part–we’re taking the kids!! Hooray for having a 4 and 3 year old with you on a long trip!!

*sigh*

Anyone catch that game on Sunday? Man, that was great, huh?? I thought it was awesome! It’s so nice to see the Pats lose. They cheat, dammit, and I hate cheaters! (By the way, you got the answers to the test?)

And for one last paragraph:

A quick update on everything going. I’ve submitted A Quarter Past Madness to another mag. I did it about 3 weeks ago, so hopefully I’ll hear back soon. If everything goes as planned, it will sell and once again I will let go of it. Shadowed Silence, the magazine publishing “The Purpose”, is postponed for only a short time. I will be sure to make links to it for purchase or examining needs.

I’m almost done with “The Toy” which I’m still playing around with whether or not to post it up – for a limited time, of course – in its rough draft form. I’ve got other great stories ready for submission and I will be getting on those as soon as I return from my trip.

(We’ve also got a new Dell Dimension Desktop computer and I’m feeling pretty inspired by it. Can’t wait to get back and have time to spend writing on it. Unfortunately, we got it in Monday afternoon; Marquis set it up when he got home from work and I had class; then Tuesday it was downloading from the old PC – which didn’t work and will have to be redone; and then today I was packing. Have to admit.. it’s been a fulfilling, busy week. I can’t wait for a chance to be lazy! . . . And write, ‘course. Ha. Ha.